ProSoundWeb Community

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

Pages: 1 [2] 3   Go Down

Author Topic: joke  (Read 8090 times)

Luke Geis

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2356
    • Owner of Endever Music Production's
Re: joke
« Reply #10 on: November 21, 2013, 12:54:54 PM »

Subbed for later enjoyment. I got one that I think is great, but is not pg13 and music related. gonna feel it out first............
Logged
I don't understand how you can't hear yourself

Joseph D. Macry

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 425
  • Austin TX
Re: joke
« Reply #11 on: November 21, 2013, 01:19:03 PM »

From classical music school:

Q. What's the difference between a bull and an orchestra?

A. A bull has the horns up front, and the a**hole in the back.
Logged
Joseph Macry,
Austin, TX

Jay Barracato

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2025
  • Solomons, MD
Re: joke
« Reply #12 on: November 21, 2013, 03:08:03 PM »

From classical music school:

Q. What's the difference between a bull and an orchestra?

A. A bull has the horns up front, and the a**hole in the back.

An electron is stopped by a cop for a traffic violation.

The cop says " Do you have any idea how fast you were going?"

The electron says "Great, now I have no clue where I am."

Sent from my DROID RAZR HD using Tapatalk

Logged
Jay Barracato

Tim Perry

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1251
  • Utica-Rome NY
Re: joke
« Reply #13 on: November 21, 2013, 05:13:07 PM »

A copper atom goes into a bar and asks: have you seen my electron? I lost one.

The bartender says: are you sure you lost one? you have so many.

the Atom replied: I'm positive!
Logged

Bob Leonard

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 6807
  • Boston, MA USA
Re: joke
« Reply #14 on: November 21, 2013, 11:55:48 PM »

Q: what do you call a Spanish guy with a rubber toe??

A: Ruuubertoe
Logged
BOSTON STRONG........
Proud Vietnam Veteran

I did a gig for Otis Elevator once. Like every job, it had it's ups and downs.

Tim Perry

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1251
  • Utica-Rome NY
Re: joke
« Reply #15 on: November 22, 2013, 01:05:48 AM »

What's the range of a Nady wireless mic?


About 20 yards if you have a good arm.
Logged

Jim Turner

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 132
  • Calgary, Alberta... Canada eh!
Re: joke
« Reply #16 on: November 27, 2013, 03:09:13 PM »

The job interview.

Human resources manager:
Whats your greatest weakness?

Old guy:
Honesty

Human resources manager:
I don't think of honesty as a weakness

Old guy:
I really don't give a shit what you think
Logged
smile & wave...

Tom Roche

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 626
  • Behind the Zion Curtain
Re: joke
« Reply #17 on: November 27, 2013, 03:50:09 PM »

What do you call a drummer with only one stick?

A conductor

-------------------------------------------------

What did the drummer say to the chick singer?

Do you want me to count this one in too slow or too fast?

-------------------------------------------------

A man walked into a bar, sat down, and ordered a beer.  As he sipped the beer, he heard a soothing voice say, “Nice tie!”  Looking around, he noticed that the bar was empty except for himself and the bartender at the end of the bar.  A few sips later, the voice said, “Beautiful shirt.”  At this, the man called the bartender over, “Hey, I must be losing my mind,” he told the bartender.  “I keep hearing these voices saying nice things, and there’s not a soul in here other than us.”  “It’s the peanuts,” answered the bartender. “Say what?”  “You heard me,” said the barkeep.”  It’s the peanuts...they’re complimentary.”
Logged

Doug Johnson

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 270
  • Rhoadesville, VA
Re: joke
« Reply #18 on: November 27, 2013, 04:44:21 PM »

Guy walks into a bar. Says to the bartender, "Give me a beer and make it a cold one, I've been outside playing music all day."  Bartender asks, "What instrument do you play?" Guy says, "Banjo."  Bartender asks, "Where's your banjo?"  Guy says, "In the back seat of my car."  Bartender gets a worried look on his face and asks "Did you park out back?"  Guy says, "Yes, is it safe?"  Bartender says, "We better go check."  As they are walking out to the car, they hear the sound of glass breaking and find the back window of the car broken.
Guy says, "Oh no, I can't look, you check."  As he looks into the back seat, the Bartender says "I was afraid this was going to happen, now there's two banjos."
Logged

Bob Leonard

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 6807
  • Boston, MA USA
Re: joke
« Reply #19 on: November 27, 2013, 10:37:19 PM »

The Lone Ranger and Tonto are out in the desert. The Lone Ranger sits down to rest and is bitten on the penis by a rattle snake.

"Quick Tonto, ride to town and get the doctor."

Tonto mounts up, rides to town, runs into the doctors office and shouts, "Lone Ranger has been bitten by snake, you come with me."

The doctor tells Tonto he can't go, but that he can save the Lone Ranger by sucking the venom from the snake bite. So, Tonto runs out of the office, jumps on his horse, and races back to the Lone Ranger.

"Tonto, where is the Doctor?" says the Lone Ranger. Tonto tells the Lone Ranger the doctor is in town helping a woman having a child and can not come to help.

The Lone Ranger asks Tonto if he told the doctor about the snake bite. Tonto pauses for some time thinking about what the doctor had said, until finally the Lone Ranger says, "Tonto, hurry, what did the doctor say???"

And Tonto said, " Doctor say you die."
Logged
BOSTON STRONG........
Proud Vietnam Veteran

I did a gig for Otis Elevator once. Like every job, it had it's ups and downs.

ProSoundWeb Community

Re: joke
« Reply #19 on: November 27, 2013, 10:37:19 PM »


Pages: 1 [2] 3   Go Up
 



Site Hosted By Ashdown Technologies, Inc.

Page created in 0.022 seconds with 22 queries.